January 29, 2011
How to: survive a long distance relationship
Fact: Relationships can be difficult, writes Ellen Tout. But what if your sweetheart lives miles away? How can anyone survive a long distance relationship?
Those first few weeks of a relationship are blissful. Her smile, her laugh, the way she makes you feel on top of the world. Oh and not forgetting the long distance train fare, phone bills and of course your lack of sleep. Let’s face it: very few long distance relationships are simply ‘blissful’.
Lesbian and bisexual women seem to be all the more likely to be cursed with long distance relationships. Thanks to dating sites like pinksofa.com and lezza.co.uk your next love could be the girl next door, or she could just as easily live in the North Pole.
But fear not, this is your long distance relationship survival guide.
The key to survival is preparation. Fail to prepare and prepare to fail! Now you may not be hiking up Everest, but sometimes a long distance relationship can feel like it.
Here’s your shopping list: A webcam, plenty of stamps and envelopes, CDs for cheesy mix tapes, and unlimited access to your savings account.
If you think most relationships are expensive then you’re in for a shock if you try long distance. You’ll soon find yourself hopping on cross county trains at a whim, sending extravagant bouquets of flowers and racking up a phone bill worthy of ten entire families.
As with any relationship, trust is the key to success. Picture this: you ring her and get put through to her answer phone.
Which of the following is most like you?
Person A – No worries, I’ll ring back later, she’s probably working or on a train.
Person B – I knew it! She’s seeing the hot girl living in the flat above! I’ll hop in my car and catch them in the act.
If you’re Person B, a long distance relationship might not be right for you. Everyone can be a little insane at times, but without trust for your partner the relationship is destined to fail. Try trusting her and hopefully you’ll get the same in return.
3. Look on the bright side
If times do ever get tough, try to remember the hidden benefits of going it long distance.
Sometimes your own space is nice. You have the time to sit back in your PJ’s, watch a film and relax. Plus, if you’re running late in the morning you can simply not bother shaving your legs. As a result you arrive early at work and nobody is any the wiser!
And when she does visit every moment is precious. It’s like you’ve met for the first time all over again. You both look forward to it for weeks, plan every moment of the weekend and can’t get enough of each other.
Cherish those moments and start planning your next visit. It’ll be worth it in the end.
Mike Freer HoC speech on gay marriage
Mike Freer, Conservative MP for Finchley and Golders Green, gives a speech in the House of Commons in favour of same sex marriage proposals.
February 5, 2013