Say it to Sappho: I want spiky hair but don’t want to come out!
August 15th, 2008
“I want my hair cut my hair short and spiky, but i don’t wanna come out to my hairdresser cos shes my mums mate! I dont want to say give me lesbian hair but i dont want to come out looking like a bloke either. what can I say??? Also can you recommend any good hair products.” Hanna, 18, South Yorkshire
Are you sure you are ready for this? Are you out to your mum? Because your hair might give it away before your hairdresser does!
Lady, look through some hair magazines, find something you like, and ask the hairdresser to copy the picture. In terms of hair products, ask your hairdresser. I have no idea what you are trying to achieve and I have never seen your hair. Although, obviously, being the expert I am, if I had you here I would be able to give a comprehensive answer. If that doesn’t help, just copy my hair - it has never let me down.
Read related article ‘Lesbian hair: the secrets untangled’.
Do you have a sex/relationship problem you need Sappho’s help with? Email Sappho@lesbilicious.co.uk, and remember to include a name, age and location.
Hanna if you’re going for a severe spiky look you will normally need a strong gluey type wax or a clay based wax depending on the thickness of your hair. Water based ones will not hold your style. Try Toni and Guy “Funky Gum” or Lee Stafford’s “Messed Up” or yeah, ask your hairdresser!
I had this problem, not with parents (I’m 23), but just that my stylist is very conservative. What I did was, everytime I went back I kept saying “how about a little shorter?” “Yeah, I liked last time, but a little shorter maybe?” After nine months I had the dyke look I wanted. It may look a bit conservative in the salon, but then go home and style it how you like. You could also just say you want it really spiky or “punk.” I use control paste for texture - it keeps your hair fairly soft but running your hand through it will stick it straight up. If you don’t want your mum to know, you can always put the paste in your hair but let it lie flat, and then just spike it with your fingers when you get to school. Good luck!
I use a firm control spray gel on my hair (it was cheap and I got it in Tesco) - it holds it in position when I want to go out etc. but I can brush it out for other times. I used to use wax, but it was a nightmare to get out of my hair without a lot of washing and made my hair greasy.
There are lots of short hair cuts that look very femme, if that’s what you want. Have a look in some magazines and find one you like, then ask your stylist to copy it. I started out with Ellen Degeneres’ style, and then got more wacky, helped with the spray gel.